How Do I Deal With Husband's Mean Condescending Attitude About My Hair

I had a husband who had that same mindset.  I don't know how to explain that mentality nor do I agree with it. But I'd call it old fashioned I suppose.  They seem to have a vision in their head of what's beautiful and what's acceptable. For men like that it's typically long and flowing hair in natural colours.  As though the gorgeous woman on his arm wakes up looking like that and his friends should be envious.    At the time I was married I went along with keeping my hair long and staying thin ( that was a big issue too).  In the end I still wasn't good enough and to make a long story short I divorced him.

Aye, part of the reason I struggle with my weight so much now is from wrecking my metabolism with diet pills and a bad attitude towards food from trying to be the 'perfect' woman for my ex. You can never really be enough for someone who wants you to completely adhere to their idea of what you should be, and it chips away at you a little every time you try to be by doing something you don't really want.

Girl, reading this made me so sad. That is one abusive relationship. He's humiliating you, that's not love, it's sick and disturbing.

You're better than that. Leave that piece of shit.

I cant really help as i've never been in this position. My partner of 9 years and I always have the same thoughts about my hair. But I can tell you that your hair looks amazing from the pictures I've seen. Dont listen to him and do what makes you feel good about yourself. To be healthy, physically but most importantly mentally, you should think about yourself first. I say get your shorter cut too if that is what you want. In the end, if you dont like it, your hair will grow back.
My partner had a beard for a while which I didnt like at all as its too prickly on my skin and his face looked too round and I did tell him that but i didnt force him to change it just because I didnt like it.

Just seen you've changed your photo to show your hair more clearly - I think it's absolutely stunning!

I agree, that an awesome effect you've got there!