I am in a sticky situation.
My dad is not happy about a choice my sibling is making.
He asked me to say what I think of my siblings choice. I said I don't want to get involved. My dad then accuses me of "always taking sides and causing problems"
He basically perceived me saying I don't want to get involved as me saying I am not taking my dads side.
I do not want to take sides! My dad has a long history of being narcissistic and putting me down and giving me self esteem issues. If I take his side my sibling will hate me. If I take my siblings side my dad will unleash his great wrath and nastiness towards me and tell me I am not an appreciative daughter.
Wtf! What's wrong with me staying neutral?
Help?
Posted : April 24, 2014 2:34 am
Tell him you won't bother speaking to him until he grows up. Sounds like there's no point trying to do anything else because he's too set in his childish behaviour.
Posted : April 24, 2014 7:45 am
What is it with families dragging us into their own issues?! The only advice I can give is what has worked for me. There's no point worrying about what you can't change (I.e. their attitude), you are better focussing on what you can change, which is your reaction to it. I've stepped back now and distanced myself from the family members that were causing me problems (which include my mother and sister in my case). I live my life in my way despite them and what they think. I'm civil and polite, but don't get involved, and more importantly don't let their reaction to my approach bother me.
It's not easy - but in the end it's definitely been worth it. I'm much happier now because I don't get caught up in their childish petty dramas, and focus instead on what makes ME happy.
Good luck!
Posted : April 27, 2014 8:47 am
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